The Co-sleeping Conspiracy

My eyes opened to darkness. The world was ending before I had even began. This is how I begin: alone. I am alone. A cry rips from my lungs as I fear I am the only one in this darkness. A single tear trickles down my cheek and I know it is hopeless. I am hopeless, helpless, and alone.

Hands reach out and pluck me from the darkness. They are soft familiar hands and in my sleepy stupor I begin my search for comfort. I quickly find milk and drift back into my dreams.

I open my eyes into night. Night is like the womb, except it is cold and dry. I am alone and I am certain the world is over. I am overwhelmed with sadness and cry out. I don't know where I am or what nowhere is, but I am nowhere. I am alone, hopeless, and helpless.

On the chest of the milky one, I find milk once more. It is a familiar feeling, though I am fairly certain this is the first time I have ever tasted this sweet liquid filling the hole on my face and dripping down into my center. The liquid brings a sweet nothingness.

I awake and I am alone. My cries echo through the emptiness. I cry out to no one because I am alone. I don't know where I am or who I am. I think this is the beginning of everything. I am at the beginning of the world. But this is the end. Everything is over. There is no hope and there is nothing. Tears blind me from the darkness.

A hand. Everything is okay. Milk. Sleep dreams.

Dark. Alone. Tears. I am the first. I am over. Milk. Sleep.

Dark. Tears. Milk. Sleep.

I am the infant version of Drew Berrymore from 50 First Dates.

They say co-sleeping is good for me or bad for me. The way I see it (or don't see it because it's dark), is that it's dark and I'm alone either way. Perhaps co-sleeping is just a conspiracy and I really am alone in the dark of night. Perhaps no one will answer my cry of desperation.

New Home

Describe an event that changed your life forever, or make up and describe an event that would change your life forever.

Today was traumatic. My home kicked me out. I did my best to resist, but after eight hours of fighting, there I was in the bright, cold place I suppose is my new home.

It began like every other day. As I gently snoozed, occasionally kicking the bladder of the carrier and dreamed of stretching out my limbs as far as they could go. They began gently at first, then the squeezes gradually became stronger and more forceful. Sure, sometimes I kicked the carrier's spleen a little to hard or punched the carrier's lung, but I hardly consider that a reason for eviction. Nevertheless, the squeezes began to feel more forceful. I began to become comforted by the squeezes and they lulled me back to sleep.

Rudely awoken by a forceful squeeze, it seemed the carrier had decided that the squeezes were not strong enough and had begun to squeeze even harder and more often. The squeezes were beginning to hurt a bit, but nothing too uncomfortable. I looked down and realized the carrier was pushing me out, but the door seemed a bit to small for me. I began to scream out to the carrier, though for my entire existence, not once did the carrier listen when I told it not to turn certain ways or eat certain foods. It was only if I really pushed the foods back up or kicked that the carrier would not do it again. Never, though, had the carrier understood my scream. Perhaps, the carrier couldn't hear...

The next few moments were a terrifying, blinding, blur. As I screaming at the carrier that the door was too small, I was pushed out so my body was still at home, but my eyes were being blinded by a brightness like I had never seen. In a moment, the rest of my body fell out the door in an uncoordinated tangle. In a moment of panic, I opened my eyes to get a better sense of what was going on, but it was all red and bright. So I, naturally, cried about.

I was wiped down with some rough materials and then the wetness of home was gone, but with it went the chill. I was wrapped up and it began to feel like the tight little home to which I was once constrained. One of the beings transporting me dripped warm wet drops from its eyes, I suppose this is some kind of greeting, I will have to remember this and try it on the next being.

After a few hours of poking and prodding and dousing me in some mildly warm liquid, I must now work to get my nutrients. The one I call the milky one (it's fairly white compared to the big one) forces parts of her body into my mouth and I have to suck the sustenance out like some sort of animal! I am hoping things improve and they do not continue to force me to work for my food. All that work for my food is tiring, so I fell asleep on the milky one.

When I awoke, I was in the arms of the big one and he gave me back to the milky one. I remembered the wet eye greeting the big one gave me earlier, so I try to procure wetness from my eyes like he did, but I couldn't, so I screamed about it and the eye wetness came with the screams. When I had drank, the big one picked me up and put me in the clear box. This was my first day, hot potato where I am the potato, being passed from one warm body to the next, but none of them smell or sound or feel like home.

I feel like no one understands me. They keep moving me from place to place and I'm scared they're going to prick my foot again.

This place is different with the milky one and the big one, but I think I could get used to this whole outside thing.

Sometimes, when I close my eyes tight and wrap my arms around the milky one, it still feels like home with the warm darkness and the thump-thump of the drum vibrating throughout the home. I am getting sleepy just thinking about home.